His life was straight out of a movie

The other day, a principal of a reputed school called me seeking help for one of her students, a boy of 13 years. She said the boy’s parents were crying for help and that they were sitting in front of her. So, I slotted an appointment for them to come and see me the same afternoon.

The family came in. As usual the boy’s parents began complaining how their son was absenting himself from school.

I spoke to the boy in front of them. His answers were in whispers which at times I could barely hear. After about 15 minutes, I asked his parents to sit outside and had a one-to-one conversation with the boy. At first, he was hesitant. When I assured him that I don’t judge people, he began interacting.

From the hour long interaction I had with him, I realised that the boy feels unloved by his parents. He feels his parents didn’t want him. He also shared with me that he was in a hostel for two years. His story made me feel that his life was straight out of the Tare Zameen Par movie.

My interaction with the boy was almost over. I asked him to sit outside and asked for his parents to come in. When I asked his parents what they thought about their son, the father said, he wanted his son to become a doctor.

The principal had mentioned that the boy was an intelligent child and scored very well. So, I didn’t know where the problem was. And I asked the boy’s parents to continue telling me about their son. When the husband and wife started sharing information sometimes individually and sometimes together, I pieced the information together. That’s when I realised what was happening with the boy.

To make their son more studious, the parents consciously neglected him. They shared with him pictures of them with their relatives children only to get their son to be even more studious. What his parents did frustrated the boy and his mind became restless. He didn’t know where to turn to for help. He began locking himself up in his room and slept all day.

He created his comfort space. He realised he needn’t get out of his room and face the world. So, he slept all day. At night, he’d stay awake watching movies.

His parents simply didn’t get it. The father pursued his desire to make his son a doctor and put him in boarding. The first year went by. At the end of the second year, the boy refused to go back to boarding. So, they put him into this school.

I asked the boy’s mother what she felt about putting the boy into boarding and she said, she wasn’t even asked. Decision was taken by her husband.

Now that he wasn’t attending school, the father was contemplating on putting him back in boarding.

I spoke to the boy’s parents and asked them whether they were ready to lose their son! Further, I asked them what difference does it make to them with what he grew up to become! Their son was studious and responsible. I helped them see a different perspective, a different way to address the situation on hand. They saw a new possibility.

As a matter of chance I asked them, how many times have you taken your child on a holiday! They said… never.

To me, this boy was on the brink of depression. The principal had saved him in the nick of time by getting help to him.

I suggested that they first restore their love for their son and then take their son out on a picnic.

In the evening the family came and this time their daughter was also present. The father came to show himself. I performed his Nadi Pariksha. After the diagnosis, I asked him, how important is others opinion of you to you? In different words he said that was all that mattered. We had nailed the root cause of the boy’s condition.

My work with the boy’s father took more time that what I took with the boy. My work with the boy was accomplished and work with his father has just begun.

Two days later I called the principal to give an update. She answered my phone call and said I’ve done a miracle. I asked her to clarify her statement. She said, the boy has resumed school. She also mentioned that the way he wishes her a good morning reassured her that the boy was okay.

Many a time, we as parents assume that we know it all and take action which at times backfires on our children. How much do we really know? I’d like to answer this question for you… actually we know nothing. Give your children a chance. Listen to your children patiently. If you can’t do that, find someone who can help you listen to your children and also get your children back on track.

You are the best example your children can find in this world. So, be the best parent they can ever find.

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Embrace happiness before you lose it to illness

Embrace your happiness before you lose it to an illness

I see people everyday. Many of the people who come to consult with me are facing high fasting blood sugar levels, high blood pressure, body pains, lack of sound sleep and several other symptoms that seem to have erupted out of thin air. They have a good job that pays them handsomely, their families are happy and yet, they suffer.

He one thing thats common amongst all these people is that they are in the wanting to do what they love doing. They look so tired from doing their mundane jobs that only finance their lifestyle but doesn’t fire their passion that they fail to understand what’s wrong and where. And how can they come out of this suffering.

One such person came to me for a consultation. He looked okay but he wasn’t cheerful. So, I performed his Nadi Pariksha (Ayurvedic Pulse Diagnosis that can also reveal redundant habits, mental patterns, attitudes and your dysfunctional parts of your personality). The diagnosis revealed that he was agitated, frustrated and he was losing sleep. He also had stiffness in his neck, increasing fasting blood sugar levels and high blood pressure.

When I discussed my diagnosis with him, he wasn’t surprised. He knew why his body was throwing out these symptoms, but he wasn’t prepared to do what he so much wanted to.

He loved teaching but, he knew it would pay him only a fraction of what his current job was paying. So, he very meticulous planned for years so that he could get to living his passion. He had achieved financial independence so that his lifestyle will not fluctuate even if he failed in his assignment. Yet, his thoughts were messing up his mornings and he would sometimes be awake in the night thinking “how am I going to do this?”

Look at yourself. Have you also been hanging in such a situation and for long?

I was recently watching a video my friend made. She made a profound statement.. The how about everything is a trap. It just keeps you hanging in that space.

It’s so true. We just keep thinking how we are going to do without actually getting up and doing what we need to. The how, is such a waste of time.

Isn’t it your fear about how your future will turn out to be that stops you from doing and keeps you in the how? It’s such a powerful habit that stops you from being you.

We are all so outcome focussed because that’s what we are taught in elementary school, in business school, literally everywhere.

Instead of focusing on life by way of measuring outcomes, if you can re-orient your approach towards life to become action centric, then the results will just turn out to be not just fine but, you’ll actually begin enjoying life.

When I assist people to take that most important step, they feel it’s a free fall. They fear. They so much want to hold onto their old habits that kept them stuck. And, when they have no choice but to face their new challenges, an inner strength comes forth which takes over their pessimism and fuels their present with a new energy. They feel liberated from their shackles of unnecessary thinking. They begin to act spontaneously. In their spontaneity, healing happens.

When life happens, the body heals and supports your every step.

It’s such a wonderful feeling. Life is never for-giving. Life is for living.

Isn’t it time you took the next step?

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Today You Get this for FREE

This is the day my journey to freedom began

Hey! I just remembered this experience that happened the same day 9 years ago which set me on the path of freedom. So, I am offering something absolutely FREE for the first 50 people only and only today. But, I ask to you to read the story and then claim your FREE Gift.

It was 9 years ago, the same day. I remember this experience as if it happened just a few hours ago.

My wife told us that she will make pizzas for us. My daughter and I jumped with joy at the idea. So, off we went to get some pizza base. So, we went to a grocer’s store to enquire. We did not find the pizza base but, what caught my daughter’s attention was a plastic Christmas tree. It must’ve been about 2 feet tall. She saw and looked at me. Her eyes were charming and there was this light of enthusiasm. She asked me, ‘Can we buy that tree? So, I asked instead, what are we going to do with it? Then she said, we’ll put up the three for Christmas. I asked, then? To which she answered, ‘We’ll keep it upright until New Years.’ I resumed my question, ‘then?’ To which she replied, ‘We’ll put it in the attic.

I explained to her that we don’t need to buy a Christmas tree to put it in the attic. She was upset. We got into the car and I drove off in search of the pizza base. There was silence in the car. I looked at my daughter’s face. She was unhappy.

I pulled the car over. Looking at her, I told her, ‘We have to go back to the store.’ Looking at me with moist eyes she asked, ‘why?’ I replied, ‘We need to get your happiness back. You left it on the Christmas tree.’ We both laughed.

In life, we leave our happiness in situations expecting those situations to make us happy. We carry these situations in the attic for a long time and then forget about it. The situations then gather dust and then we have to deal with a lot more stuff than just the situation. The truth is, situations do not make us happy. We can make our situation a happy one. All we have to do is to invest happiness and joy in the situation and that’s what it will turn out to become.

In our expectations from situations, we forget to be loving, happy and joyful.

Over the years, I realised the importance of these three words… Love, Happiness and Joy. I began to practice forgiveness. I released every experience, one by one. It took me 6 years. I worked on myself every single day. And finally, my attic was empty.

Because it happened the same day 9 years ago. I am giving away the Forgiveness Audio Guide for FREE for the first 50 people only and only today.

Claim your FREE GIFT from my webstore https://nadichikitsa.net. Your coupon code is “be joyful” at checkout.

You can also choose any other product and get 50% off. Enter coupon code “jingle bells“.

I ask you to share this post so more and more people can benefit beginning today so that they can have a New Year in the true sense.

– Mahesh Krishnamurthy